THREE ON THE THIRD
(it's coming)
Monday, June 30, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
Boot-boot.
Today I went with Cousin K to see Uncle Lou. "Uncle" is a term of respect for older men in Hawaii, so while Cousin K is my real cousin, Uncle Lou is not my uncle. Uncle Lou is a retired fisherman, a laid-back, loquacious Portagee with a white mustache and a twinkly smile. He used to fish with Cousin K's dad, my real uncle. I first met him a week ago, when he gave me a bottle of aloe vera spray for the sunburns he predicted I would get. I have been vigilant with sunblock and hats, so my burns have been minimal, but the gesture and the ironic charm with which it was given ("There, now don't say no one in Hawaii ever gave you anything") won my heart.
Cousin K has come to look at a lure Uncle Lou is making for him, but also to talk story. They have got past the initial negotiations, and now they are talking about me.
Ask her what her favorite fish is, says Cousin K.
Uncle Lou looks at me, his smile skeptical: What's your favorite fish?
Taape! I grin.
Taape?!
You hear that? Cousin K beams.
The taape is a fish that no local fisherman respects; it is an introduced species that crowds the native fishes, and most locals think its flavor is substandard. It's a pretty fish, though, and easy to catch, and there are plenty of them, and tourists don't care. So my cousins have made the taape the primary target of their bottom fishing business. This means their overall impact on the local fish population is positive. Makes sense to me, but most locals think they're crazy.
Well, that's all I've caught so far, I shrug. That and one triggerfish.
Triggerfish? says Uncle Lou. Everyone will know you're a haole if you call it a triggerfish.
Yeah, they'd never know otherwise, I mumble. The color of my skin gets comments from every fisherman I meet; it's like having a tattoo on my forehead that says NOPE, NOT FROM AROUND HERE. But I don't tan well, and there's enough skin cancer in my family tree that it's not worth the risk just to get slightly less pale.
Not a triggerfish, Uncle Lou continues. Locals call it a humu, or duk-duk, or boot-boot.
Duk-duk I've heard, but boot-boot? says Cousin K.
You pull him up out of the water, what does he say? Uncle Lou asks me. What does he say?
I pause to picture a triggerfish freshly dragged up from the ocean floor, spitting out white goo and gasping audibly... Boot-boot! I answer.
You see? says Uncle Lou. He and Cousin K begin an anecdote-filled debate on which kinds of triggerfish are good to eat, and I inspect the latest batch of lures. They are sparkly and smooth, a variety of shapes and iridescent colors, so pretty that even I want to put them in my mouth. Uncle Lou is a master luremaker, but since he closed his shop downtown he only makes them for friends. His garage workshop is filled with the sweetly chemical smell of heated plastic.
The discussion of triggerfish ends with much skeptical head-shaking on both sides, and we walk back to the truck. Just wait, I'm gonna bring you some fillets, says Cousin K.
Bye Uncle Lou, I say, waving.
Don't catch anymore triggerfish, he calls after me. Catch boot-boot.
Cousin K has come to look at a lure Uncle Lou is making for him, but also to talk story. They have got past the initial negotiations, and now they are talking about me.
Ask her what her favorite fish is, says Cousin K.
Uncle Lou looks at me, his smile skeptical: What's your favorite fish?
Taape! I grin.
Taape?!
You hear that? Cousin K beams.
The taape is a fish that no local fisherman respects; it is an introduced species that crowds the native fishes, and most locals think its flavor is substandard. It's a pretty fish, though, and easy to catch, and there are plenty of them, and tourists don't care. So my cousins have made the taape the primary target of their bottom fishing business. This means their overall impact on the local fish population is positive. Makes sense to me, but most locals think they're crazy.
Well, that's all I've caught so far, I shrug. That and one triggerfish.
Triggerfish? says Uncle Lou. Everyone will know you're a haole if you call it a triggerfish.
Yeah, they'd never know otherwise, I mumble. The color of my skin gets comments from every fisherman I meet; it's like having a tattoo on my forehead that says NOPE, NOT FROM AROUND HERE. But I don't tan well, and there's enough skin cancer in my family tree that it's not worth the risk just to get slightly less pale.
Not a triggerfish, Uncle Lou continues. Locals call it a humu, or duk-duk, or boot-boot.
Duk-duk I've heard, but boot-boot? says Cousin K.
You pull him up out of the water, what does he say? Uncle Lou asks me. What does he say?
I pause to picture a triggerfish freshly dragged up from the ocean floor, spitting out white goo and gasping audibly... Boot-boot! I answer.
You see? says Uncle Lou. He and Cousin K begin an anecdote-filled debate on which kinds of triggerfish are good to eat, and I inspect the latest batch of lures. They are sparkly and smooth, a variety of shapes and iridescent colors, so pretty that even I want to put them in my mouth. Uncle Lou is a master luremaker, but since he closed his shop downtown he only makes them for friends. His garage workshop is filled with the sweetly chemical smell of heated plastic.
The discussion of triggerfish ends with much skeptical head-shaking on both sides, and we walk back to the truck. Just wait, I'm gonna bring you some fillets, says Cousin K.
Bye Uncle Lou, I say, waving.
Don't catch anymore triggerfish, he calls after me. Catch boot-boot.
Saturday, June 14, 2008
My Life Gets Awesomer.
You guys, I can't even bring myself to blog about the last few days because it would just sound like an extended bragging session.
I am so lucky, it's not even fair.
I am so lucky, it's not even fair.
Sunday, June 08, 2008
Three on the Third on the Eighth?
I didn't forget! I've just been a little busy. sorry everybody
Comics by me: 1 2 3
Comics by Alfhild: 1 2 3
Links to excellent comics by: evannichols, grrlpup, alissa, upsidedown cat, patchwork, recoveringmale
Tell me if I left anyone out.
The last week has been sort of epic. The tragic part of the epic is that I spent the better part of two days in the crawlspace, and, well... Alissa said I should scan my diagram to show you how much of the ductwork is now insulated. So here it is. The done parts are the scribbly parts.
It took me a very great mental effort to acknowledge that there was no way I was going to finish applying the insulation before leaving for the summer. I kept thinking it couldn't possibly take as long as it was taking. It's not like I was having so much fun I didn't notice the time passing. It could be that negotiating and re-negotiating every movement in such tight quarters multiplies the time involved. Or there could be some kind of weird time-warping field under my house (I wouldn't be surprised, this place is so wacky). Anyway I am not very happy about having this project waiting for me when I come back.
On the other hand, I did get the ducts completely mammal-proofed. There will be no more tiny whiskery visitors popping in through the vents. Gina it is totally safe to come over now. Also I got a constellation of bruises on my hip in the shape of a snowman-style smiley face! How's that for a souvenir.
Anyway the awesome part of the epic week was all the help I got from friends! While I was working in slo-mo under the house, Alfhild was zooming around packing my stuff into boxes and cleaning things and cooking amazing food and completing giant to-do lists like a sparkling whirlwind of AWESOME. Then sanguinity and grrlpup and alissa cleaned up my back yard! Sanguinity wielded Plumbane, Chainsaw of Legend, and lo the plum trees fell before her like mown corn. Grrlpup wasn't even supposed to help and then she totally did anyway, because she is An Unstoppable Force of Kindness. Alissa transformed herself into a Mecha Yardbot and worked furiously for I think about 8 hours, most of them without a break. She is not actually human you know. Then my yard debris and mousey old insulation were transported to the dump by none other than the Mighty Thor himself! (It took two trips. Thor may be mighty, but he is not omnipotent.)
So today there is some time for breathing and for saying goodbyes and for doing laundry. And tomorrow is going to be nonstop craziness while I try to get myself packed and cleaned up and cleared away without actually staying up all night (this is a little joke I have with myself). And then the next morning I fly to Maui! So this is the last blog post in Portland for a while.
Comics by me: 1 2 3
Comics by Alfhild: 1 2 3
Links to excellent comics by: evannichols, grrlpup, alissa, upsidedown cat, patchwork, recoveringmale
Tell me if I left anyone out.
The last week has been sort of epic. The tragic part of the epic is that I spent the better part of two days in the crawlspace, and, well... Alissa said I should scan my diagram to show you how much of the ductwork is now insulated. So here it is. The done parts are the scribbly parts.
It took me a very great mental effort to acknowledge that there was no way I was going to finish applying the insulation before leaving for the summer. I kept thinking it couldn't possibly take as long as it was taking. It's not like I was having so much fun I didn't notice the time passing. It could be that negotiating and re-negotiating every movement in such tight quarters multiplies the time involved. Or there could be some kind of weird time-warping field under my house (I wouldn't be surprised, this place is so wacky). Anyway I am not very happy about having this project waiting for me when I come back.
On the other hand, I did get the ducts completely mammal-proofed. There will be no more tiny whiskery visitors popping in through the vents. Gina it is totally safe to come over now. Also I got a constellation of bruises on my hip in the shape of a snowman-style smiley face! How's that for a souvenir.
Anyway the awesome part of the epic week was all the help I got from friends! While I was working in slo-mo under the house, Alfhild was zooming around packing my stuff into boxes and cleaning things and cooking amazing food and completing giant to-do lists like a sparkling whirlwind of AWESOME. Then sanguinity and grrlpup and alissa cleaned up my back yard! Sanguinity wielded Plumbane, Chainsaw of Legend, and lo the plum trees fell before her like mown corn. Grrlpup wasn't even supposed to help and then she totally did anyway, because she is An Unstoppable Force of Kindness. Alissa transformed herself into a Mecha Yardbot and worked furiously for I think about 8 hours, most of them without a break. She is not actually human you know. Then my yard debris and mousey old insulation were transported to the dump by none other than the Mighty Thor himself! (It took two trips. Thor may be mighty, but he is not omnipotent.)
So today there is some time for breathing and for saying goodbyes and for doing laundry. And tomorrow is going to be nonstop craziness while I try to get myself packed and cleaned up and cleared away without actually staying up all night (this is a little joke I have with myself). And then the next morning I fly to Maui! So this is the last blog post in Portland for a while.
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Jroontime!
Hey, it's Jroon again! By now you might know that with a new month comes a reminder: the Third is nearly upon us. It's time to locate your favorite pen (or other medium) and prepare to draw three comics about whatever happens to you on Tuesday the Third. If you've been meaning to try this but just haven't got around to it, Jroon is a really good month for trying new things! I wouldn't have named my domain after it otherwise.
So I suppose you're wondering what happened when I went back under my house. (If not, just pretend you are for a sec.) I have now spent a total of at least 10 hours just sealing up the air intake ductwork with metal tape. That's where the mouse problem was, and it was pretty easy to see where they got in. I am very disappointed with whomever installed the original ducts. They went to all the trouble of providing a very spacious, convenient entry point for small mammals, and then forgot the cute little porch light, mailbox, and welcome mat.
The best part about this was that the intake ducts are all on the north side of the house, which is slightly downhill from the other side, and therefore I had a few more inches to maneuver. After finishing up most of the taping on Friday, I was lying there looking out at the driveway through the vent in the foundation and wondering if it would be such a terrible idea just to doze off for a sec, when the phone rang. The phone was on the other end of the crawlspace, so even as I was inching over toward it, I knew I wouldn't catch it in time. But when I finally got there, I found a voicemail notifying me that there was still lots of room on the 8-11pm fireworks sail.
I wasn't planning to go sailing Friday night; I was going to work until dark and then clean up and wearily fall into bed (and then go help out all day Saturday). But... but...! I'll spare you the inner debate; I went and watched the Rose Festival fireworks from the Lady Washington.
It was really, really weird to go directly from breathing through a dust mask in the cramped crawlspace to climbing the Lady's foremast over the Willamette at dusk. Likewise to go from spending hours alone in the dark to being surrounded by people who were ridiculously happy to see me. But the transition was as welcome as it was disorienting.
Even though (as the weekend was booked full with weekendy things) that means I won't actually get around to installing any new insulation until Monday. BOO TO THAT.
So I suppose you're wondering what happened when I went back under my house. (If not, just pretend you are for a sec.) I have now spent a total of at least 10 hours just sealing up the air intake ductwork with metal tape. That's where the mouse problem was, and it was pretty easy to see where they got in. I am very disappointed with whomever installed the original ducts. They went to all the trouble of providing a very spacious, convenient entry point for small mammals, and then forgot the cute little porch light, mailbox, and welcome mat.
The best part about this was that the intake ducts are all on the north side of the house, which is slightly downhill from the other side, and therefore I had a few more inches to maneuver. After finishing up most of the taping on Friday, I was lying there looking out at the driveway through the vent in the foundation and wondering if it would be such a terrible idea just to doze off for a sec, when the phone rang. The phone was on the other end of the crawlspace, so even as I was inching over toward it, I knew I wouldn't catch it in time. But when I finally got there, I found a voicemail notifying me that there was still lots of room on the 8-11pm fireworks sail.
I wasn't planning to go sailing Friday night; I was going to work until dark and then clean up and wearily fall into bed (and then go help out all day Saturday). But... but...! I'll spare you the inner debate; I went and watched the Rose Festival fireworks from the Lady Washington.
It was really, really weird to go directly from breathing through a dust mask in the cramped crawlspace to climbing the Lady's foremast over the Willamette at dusk. Likewise to go from spending hours alone in the dark to being surrounded by people who were ridiculously happy to see me. But the transition was as welcome as it was disorienting.
Even though (as the weekend was booked full with weekendy things) that means I won't actually get around to installing any new insulation until Monday. BOO TO THAT.
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